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The Lizard of Oz

Daddy overhears the kids playing with their brooms (which used to be featured in chimney sweep “Mary Poppins” reenactments)…

C:  My face is green, and I have a big black hat, Fisher, because I’m the green one.
F:  But, what witch could I be?
C (motioning with her hand as if chucking a ball of fire at the scarecrow):  And I am going to play ball from the top of that house.
F:  But, Cory, what witch could I be?
C:  Um, you could be that witch that goes by bubble…
F (interrupting):  But, I don’t want to be a good witch.  I just want to be a bad witch.  What bad witch could I be?
C:  Well, you could be the bad witch with those red slippers, the one that is my sister.
F:  Um, is there another bad witch I could be?
C:  No, you could be that witch.

Pause.

F:  Daddy!?  Daddy?  Cory says that I, er, uh, have to be the bad witch with the, er, uh, red slippers from the Lizard of Oz, but I don’t want to be that witch.
D:  Why not?
F (sad face):  Because she just gets, um, er, smushed by a house, and that’s it.
D (conspiratorial voice):  Oh, Fisher, see, that’s what you think, but the Wicked Witch of the East, the one under the house, was so super bad.  Wow, she did so many things before Dorothy’s house smushed her.
F (tone changing):  She did?
D:  Oh, yah, she did!  I can’t even tell you right now all of the bad things that she did!  And did you know what color her face was?
F:  No.
C:  What color?
D (gasping):  An ugly, nasty PURPLE!

Pause.

F (turning back to  Cory):  Cory, I could be that house witch.  The Lizard’s sister.  And, I have an ugly purple face, so…
C:  Okay, Fisher.  Get on your broom!  (Doing her best witch cackle as she sweeps away…)

Sounds like they have been just the right amount of traumatized by actually seeing a wicked witch.

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