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Off to London

Wafting out of their bedroom around 6:30 a.m. yesterday morning…

F:  Cory, do I need to wear my boots?
C:  Yes, Fisher.  It is cold in London, so you should wear boots, okay?
F:  Okay.

Pause while Fisher boots up. 

C:  Did you put your things in your suitcase?
F:  Yes.
C:  Okay, Cho-cho is ready, we have our necklaces, and I have money, okay?
F:  Okay, but Cho-cho needs his boots, right?
C:  Dogs don’t wear boots.  That’s silly.  Now, come on, Fisher.  Are you ready?  Iffin you don’t hurry, we are just going to miss the plane.  Fisher, I have the money.

The travelers then emerge, announcing that they are off to the airport. Their “money” (four small Pinkalicious books) probably wouldn’t have gotten them very far, but that’s just a theory, since Fisher later grabs them to “count” the money himself, causing a meltdown.  The stress of travel can test even the best relationship.

Sharing with Buki

A clown hired by a solar store to attract traffic to their grand opening advertises free face painting and glitter tattoos.  Daddy and the kids, fresh from the ice cream joint, get snagged walking by.  After the usual clown pleasantries…Buki (the clown, pointing to Cory, then Daddy):  Oh, this one looks just like you.
D (smiling):  Yes, she does.
B (pointing to Fisher):  Now, you, though…(pause)…looks more like your mother?
D (not skipping a beat):  I’m gay, and Cory and Fisher are my kids with my partner. So…
B:  So, he looks more like…
D:  Papa.
B (pointing to Daddy again and then to Cory):  Can I venture that you are part of the gene pool here and…
D:  Exactly.
B:  And Papa is part of the gene pool…
D:  Right.
B:  Oh, I see! So, that’s possible!? Isn’t it so great that we can share these things openly these days?The remaining fifteen minutes are filled with details about how she is off to Mexico soon, used Air BnB, is staying by herself with three guys who are already live there and are surely gay, isn’t it fabulous, they are loaning her their windsurf something, so wonderful to feel safe and easy, etc., etc.  Upon our departure…

B:  Bye, now, kids.  (Turning to Daddy.)  Thanks for sharing so much with me today.
D:  Yes, it was nice.  Thank you. Have fun in Mexico.

In the car afterward…

F:  Daddy, what you share with that clown?
D:  Oh, our time, Fisher!
F:  Oh, that’s not much, is it, Daddy?
D:  No, not really.
C:  She talk a lot.
D:  She talks a lot; yes, Cory, she sure does. I like it when clowns talk a lot, don’t you?

Two hours later, Daddy hears Cory and Fisher debut a new game in the other room, “face painting”:  Cory the clown who talks a lot, Fisher the kid who sits quietly while she dusts his face with an empty paint brush, and Daddy thinking it was the clown, not him, who shared so much today.

The Filibuster

It usually requires intervention to wrest the floor away from Cory. So, when Fisher is handed the mic, he quickly deploys the filibuster…

C: …and then Tay Tay said she’s sorry…
D (quickly interrupting): Thanks, Cory! That was a great story. I just loved the part about the Tay Tay and the saying I’m sorry. Riveting stuff. Now, it’s Fisher’s turn. Fisher, what did you want to tell me?

F: Um, Daddy, today in the sandbox, eh, eh…Ellie just put some sand on my arm and that was not nice of her, so I told Ellie that that was not nice, and she just hugged me but didn’t ask because she’s suss-posed to ask me before she hug me, but I did not tell the teacher about it eh, eh, becauauauause…(drawing out the vowel to avoid dead air)…um, um, and Vivek was on the front of the train and I was just on the back but we switched turns, but it was a school express; no, it wasn’t a Polar Express because, eh, eh, um, um, Polar Express, it goes to the North Pole but only on Christmas, aaaaaand…um, um, Christmas comes next year because Easter…

Cory rests head on hand and stares at Daddy, an attitude she’s been copping for years now…

F: …comes after…um, um, Daddy, what Easter comes after?
D: Valentine’s Day.
F: So, on Valentine’s Day, that’s going to be so nice because I am going to make you a heart so you could just wear it, aaaand…
C (catching Daddy’s eye and pointing at Fisher in disgust): Daddy, do you have an idea what he talking about?

Daddy hides smile.
C: (Still pointing.) Because I don’t.
F: …you could just wear it on Easter, on your blue shirt becauauauause, eh, eh, um, um,…

Twins’ Café: Sanitation

With respect to sanitation, Twins’ Cafe prides itself on many things, including its obsessive adherence to the strictest of guidelines, subjecting our staff to a rigorous training program so that we can provide our customers the cleanest and healthiest of environments in which to enjoy high-quality, low-temperature cuisine.

Right this way…

Twins’ Cafe: Grand Opening

Wafting from the kitchen Saturday afternoon…

P: Fisher, you want to bring me a Diet Coke?
F: Yes.
P: And a glass of ice?
F: Yes.
P: Let’s see if you can do that.
F (enthusiastic): Okay! (Pause.) …But, Papa?
P: Yes?
F: Where is the Diet Coke?
P: In the garage, but, here, given how things are going, you will definitely have to wait some tables during college, so you are going to need the right look…

Lots of muffled commotion, cries from Cory to participate, and ten minutes later, Papa has both in aprons and hats, her set up as a chef in the kitchen with him taking Papa’s orders by clipboard. Items on the menu include cooked carrots and radishes, café hours 12 to 2, attentive service, almost no time between courses…oh, and by “cooked carrots and radishes,” they mean raw carrots and radishes…their cooking philosophy is very low (read, room) temperature.